The Isolation Diaries: Stage One — Asking God Why
As I write this blog, I’m listening to We Cry Out by Quandra Banks. You should actually play it while reading this. My prayer is that as these words flow, God orchestrates them in a way that speaks directly to your spirit. May He meet you right where you are, the same way He met me when I asked Him this question:
“God, why do I keep attracting people who aren’t aligned with me?”
It wasn’t just about relationships. It was friendships, business connections, even people I tried to help. Time after time, I would notice that what I was giving out wasn’t being matched in return. I would pour in deeply, but what I received back felt surface-level, draining, or even harmful.
And I couldn’t understand why.
The Weight of the Question
Asking God this question was uncomfortable. Because part of me already knew the answer wasn’t going to be about them — it was going to be about me. Isolation has a way of making you sit with yourself, your patterns, and your choices. And God uses that quiet space to show you what needs to be refined.
I began to see that my problem wasn’t just attracting people out of alignment — it was also allowing them to stay. I hadn’t built boundaries strong enough to protect the version of me God was calling me to become.
The Lesson in Stage One
The first stage of isolation revealed this truth: not everyone is meant to walk with you into your becoming. Some people are drawn to your light, but they don’t carry the oil to pour back into you. And if you’re not careful, you’ll mistake attention for alignment.
God was showing me that I needed to stop asking, “Why do they keep coming?” and start asking, “Why do I keep entertaining it?”
That shift hurt, but it also healed. It reminded me that discernment is part of destiny.
Scripture That Anchored Me
One scripture that spoke loudly in this stage was Amos 3:3 — “Can two walk together, except they be agreed?”
I realized that walking with people who don’t agree with your spirit or your assignment will always lead to frustration. Isolation is God’s way of pulling you aside to see it clearly, so you can make room for divine alignment.
Reflection for You
If you’re in a season where everyone around you feels out of alignment, don’t take it as rejection — take it as redirection. Ask God what He’s showing you about yourself. What boundaries need to be built? What patterns need to be broken? What version of you is He trying to protect?
Because sometimes, the first stage of isolation isn’t about them at all. It’s about you — and the becoming God is calling you into.
